Family

 Who is your family?

I gave birth to three children, so they are my family. Those relationships don't ever change. I am their mother. They are my children.

It was my responsibility to take care of them and keep them safe into adulthood.

Like a bird that wants to leave the nest, some children leave too soon. Two years in a row, here, in the back yard, birds have either left the nest too soon or the mother pushed them too early. I actually can't tell you which way it went but each year, a young bird has died because our dogs attack it when it squawks and if it can't get back in the nest... it is no match for big dogs. 

Moral of that happening... birds have to be strong enough to fly when they leave the nest or they are in mortal danger. I was cycling, two weeks ago, and another flightless bird was hopping on the road, oblivious to the danger... I shooed the bird into a bush and just as I turned my back, a cat was stalking it.

So, parenting is hard work. I have seven brothers and sisters and, I can assure you, we all had slightly different, or maybe even, vastly different parenting styles.

I would never have treated my children in one way my folks thought was acceptable and that was... we were often required to play outside for most of the day so we wouldn't mess up the house. Let me just say that I really hated that! Who wants to be playing outside when it's deathly hot and we might get heat stroke? That is crazy! I think that old school iron rod parenting went out of style a long time ago. If anybody did that today, they would be charged with cruelty.

Then there was that... Saturday bath day thing... My prayer, every day was... can we have Saturday every day... as I used the sink to wash everything I could, my hair and body and feet. How many people can even get their feet into a sink? So, my childhood memories of bathing have transformed me into a 'cleanie' that takes one to three baths a day. It's a little like backlash against a bad system... I didn't like that so now I have all the baths I want... every day. I also made sure my sons had their own bathroom that was very swanky manly so I didn't have to share their space. No fighting or squabbling when you provide the right home living conditions.

I don't remember my sister Eva washing her hair every day. I'll have to ask her. We always had to catch the same bus so my hair was always wet.

My sister- in- law Anita complained that my brother Neil had to wash his hair every day and I looked at her silently and thought... yes, that's the way we should do things... that's hygienic. 

So, these were problems, in childhood, that we all worked out in adulthood when we were no longer under the old folks' old- timers' rules. 

My best advice is to always upgrade your living as you can afford and, because we are intelligent and have the capacity to see what is best, create the optimum environment for your family. That is what you, surely, want them to remember you by.