Family Problems

 It has been rumoured that three sisters of Elfrieda have hosted events for over ten years that, somehow, were not events that they had a right to host.

It is being required of Mary, Sara, and Eva to give an account of their activities in the past 12 years if they had anything to do with relationships from the Meadows West women. 

It is possible that they were conned into doing illegal activities but I, as their youngest sister, Elfrieda, am willing for them to prove that they have meant me no harm and that my children have been treated with the utmost respect and protected against any outside forces of financial extortion or physical threat and harm.

I am very sure that all of my brothers and sisters would never allow my children to be harmed for the sake of money in their bank accounts. This would simply not be a Christian thing to do, ever. So, the rumours that have proliferated must be torn apart and investigated and put to rights.

I will not allow any 'bad press' about myself or my children or grandchildren and I am sure my Christian siblings would not create any bad press or allow others to physically attack my children in their homes or in any of the family homes.

My concern for the well- being of my sons and their children is the focus of my thoughts every day. 

I welcome all evidence that my children are healthy and well and that they are financially doing as well as they were when they lived at home, with me, and all had a vehicle and a down payment for a house within a year of getting married. The oldest son had his down payment before he left the family home.

I will not abide reputational slurs from anyone. Proof of financial gain or loss will need to come in the form of financial bank statements. 

My children and grandchildren are all welcome in my home, to stay safely, as we work out all these problems.

If Ray and Dave, Eva's and Sara's husbands, respectively, would like to drive my children to my house, in Dauphin, or if they have a house, for me, Elfrieda, in Winnipeg, I would like to be contacted today to know that my children are very safe and sound and absolutely protected.

I choose to count on my family to prove their verity in this situation with regards to qualifying their activities and the safety of my personal family, my sons and their children.

Family

 Who is your family?

I gave birth to three children, so they are my family. Those relationships don't ever change. I am their mother. They are my children.

It was my responsibility to take care of them and keep them safe into adulthood.

Like a bird that wants to leave the nest, some children leave too soon. Two years in a row, here, in the back yard, birds have either left the nest too soon or the mother pushed them too early. I actually can't tell you which way it went but each year, a young bird has died because our dogs attack it when it squawks and if it can't get back in the nest... it is no match for big dogs. 

Moral of that happening... birds have to be strong enough to fly when they leave the nest or they are in mortal danger. I was cycling, two weeks ago, and another flightless bird was hopping on the road, oblivious to the danger... I shooed the bird into a bush and just as I turned my back, a cat was stalking it.

So, parenting is hard work. I have seven brothers and sisters and, I can assure you, we all had slightly different, or maybe even, vastly different parenting styles.

I would never have treated my children in one way my folks thought was acceptable and that was... we were often required to play outside for most of the day so we wouldn't mess up the house. Let me just say that I really hated that! Who wants to be playing outside when it's deathly hot and we might get heat stroke? That is crazy! I think that old school iron rod parenting went out of style a long time ago. If anybody did that today, they would be charged with cruelty.

Then there was that... Saturday bath day thing... My prayer, every day was... can we have Saturday every day... as I used the sink to wash everything I could, my hair and body and feet. How many people can even get their feet into a sink? So, my childhood memories of bathing have transformed me into a 'cleanie' that takes one to three baths a day. It's a little like backlash against a bad system... I didn't like that so now I have all the baths I want... every day. I also made sure my sons had their own bathroom that was very swanky manly so I didn't have to share their space. No fighting or squabbling when you provide the right home living conditions.

I don't remember my sister Eva washing her hair every day. I'll have to ask her. We always had to catch the same bus so my hair was always wet.

My sister- in- law Anita complained that my brother Neil had to wash his hair every day and I looked at her silently and thought... yes, that's the way we should do things... that's hygienic. 

So, these were problems, in childhood, that we all worked out in adulthood when we were no longer under the old folks' old- timers' rules. 

My best advice is to always upgrade your living as you can afford and, because we are intelligent and have the capacity to see what is best, create the optimum environment for your family. That is what you, surely, want them to remember you by. 

Pension Problems

 Dear Elfrieda,

My Dad got involved with some very bad people in 2013. The people he started drinking with were severe alcoholics. At that time, he was still driving his Ford Explorer which my Mom paid for. Unfortunately, he crashed his vehicle and a DUI charge impounded his vehicle. The problem with my Dad is that he thought these people, he got involved with, were his friends. We were told that one of the worst women, from the group, extorted money from my Mom's 92 year old father. She was a babysitter. Then, we were told that this same woman, living in Meadows West, somehow started stealing my Dad's pension funds. We aren't sure how she manipulated her way into his life to leave him destitute and relying on me to provide for him. Now, he is getting into another bad relationship with another terrible woman who is threatening me and my family with violent intent. My son is not safe all day long because people come into my house, unbidden, and strange people have taken charge of my house. I am so afraid every day. Fornication has taken place and my son is terrified and crying. We don't get to eat when and if we want to because the crazy people who come here threaten us... the homeowners! This morning a crazy woman required my son to beg for his food, as if he is a dog. These problems are so huge, I don't know where to begin to deal with them. Do I ask my Dad to find his own place to live so his 'friends and family' won't come here?

                                                                          Three troubled sons

Dear Sons,

I will tell you how I kept my life under control when I was raising my three sons. We didn't have these problems in the house, ever. I didn't invite people into my house that thought they could manipulate me and steal from me and lie. That was a golden rule I lived by. My sons were not molested because I was the 'tiger at the door' guarding my family. This was always Rule #1- If you intend to do harm, you don't come into the house. That needs to be your method of keeping yourself safe. Rule #2- When you're in my house, you follow my rules of respect. For instance, a very young Alex was invited, by my youngest son, to play video games. He came in the back door and I gave him the rules. "Hi, I'm your friends' Mom and we have a Christian principles home which means, no swearing, lying, stealing, or fighting. I know when you play video games the swearing is out of control but please respect each other if the video game is really bad. I'm just baking cookies and I'll bring a plate downstairs when they're ready." 

Now, let's apply these principles to the Dad that my kids grew up with. He never brought people into the home, that only he knew, ... never. I'll tell you why that is. He always said, the people I know aren't very good people. They aren't the kind you'd want your children to be exposed to. That is wise. He knew you don't expose your children to these kinds of people.

So, if you have a Dad that is not following these safety principles, you will have to ask him to find a place to live that is safe for him, making things safe for you. If your Dad has terrible relatives, (some people do), he can decide if he wants them to come to his place, instead of yours. Now, getting the pension funds back from a criminal alcoholic babysitter is going to require a lawyer. If that person stole from your Dad, you could try confronting with a pastor or a willing witness. If Dave and Janet (It used to be Dick and Jane), stole the pension funds, get a lawyer. I will be writing about a Stacy that steals food from her cousins after they pay for their meals. You are responsible for the financial well- being of your child, by law, by ethics, by moral obligation.

                                                             Hoping this helps you make wiser decisions

Telephone curse

If you knew how many people have told me that my phones don't work... it is almost unbelievable. So, last month I paid $120.00 for six months of phone service for one of my phones. One month later, when I tried to make a phone call, the nonsense message said I didn't have enough minutes to make a call. 

The next day I trudged back to the store and the same man who had sold me the $120.00 cash- six- month- service insisted that I had used data. Well, I don't ever use data on this phone because my eyes are not good enough to see anything on such a small screen so... I also thought I clearly stated that I only wanted talk and text on this phone so how do I then have a bunch of data charges? He showed me the screen and I thought... no blooming way that is my phone account. 

So, then I said... I never 'google' anything on my phone so can data be accessed if you don't have data on your account? That's when he showed me the screen of 'multiple' expensive charges. 

I looked at him with quite a bit of suspicion. I wonder if my phone service is as bad as the kers (curse) lake service... you know when you go to the lake and you curse the terrible phone service!

So, then he said, 'Give me another $20 dollars and then you'll get another month of service. Well, if I give him another $20 every month it's like paying double. 

Is it just me or do other people think 'small town rip- offs' are commonplace petty theft? I really hope that guy knows what he's doing. I can't afford this feeling of someone 'double- dipping.'

One more thing... since the button was turned off for the 'accidental data usage,' I can't send a text... it just bounces back and says 'not sent.'

Family note- could everyone make sure Scott isn't getting beat up by crazy relatives or anyone else. You can't believe the rumours coming this way. Neil, or Dave, or Ray, if you can find out if there is someone in Scott's life that has put a restraining order out on him, and his wife and his son. Someone said that a person they are not in good relationship with did that so I wouldn't come check to see if he is safe. You are good at investigating these things. I believe the person who did this, is likely wanting to hurt him and keeping people away from his house would be the perfect way to really do bad things. Don't you agree? Wouldn't that be something we call premeditated?

My Home

 I think my sons may have been safe last night... possibly my grandchildren too. 

My 28 plus years home is still a very special memories place for me. I am waiting to hear if it is available for me. I would certainly love to be there before the cold winter winds set in. I would also like to spend time there with any of my sons who are ill so we can catch up on the lost years when others were controlling our lives and very bad things did, indeed, happen.

I have a new phone number that ends in 90. I just have to get a phone that can actually make a call and receive a call. 

My novel, that I wrote in that long time home, will always be my legacy. It has such a life to it. I always say, it was truly inspired by God... every day and year I worked on it and produced this finished written work and self- published it. And then... created blankets, some call them quilts, to really make it real.

I hear my son has something for me that I really need, really, really need. So, I will be  so happy to get that good news.

Define Danger

 Dear Elfrieda,

I have a friend who has come to my place for sleepovers since she was 3 years old. She is now over 40. I am concerned about the lives she has ruined because of her tantrums and out- of- control behaviour. She has a son and a husband but she thinks nothing of abandoning them to come and be taken care of, by me. Recently, she confessed that she took out a protection order to keep her sons' mother away from their home. The sons' mom would bring things to their home to try to keep in touch with him and his son. She has a strange because I married him, I own him mentality. She has controlled every aspect of his life except being a real wife... the kind that cooks, cleans, and protects the home front. She confessed that both her husband and son have been raped. I can't even sleep thinking about the danger they are in. Her husband was working for a very bad company and the men who are employed with that disaster have stolen from him and beaten him. I am not sure why she doesn't take out a protection order against these people. I am so worried about her son. He just isn't living a normal life. The husband gets pushed around every time he tries to make a sandwich. The situation is untenable. I am a very patient person but even I am becoming rather cross with the whole situation. How do I tell her to grow up? How can I help her get the abusive people out of their home and get her back on track with Christian values?

                                                                                                                        Cross Rhonda

Dear Cross Rhonda,

You sound like a very reliable and concerned person. Most people don't use the old- fashioned term being cross with someone. I like that. Most people say... I am so mad, I can't stand her... he pisses me off... very low- classed vernacular. 

You must encourage her to make sure the bedrooms are safe... no visitors are ever to be allowed, in the house, that would enter a bedroom. People like that are never safe. Have you a copy of the very helpful book 'Boundaries?' I read that book over 20 years ago and it is still so valid. This is probably where that household needs to be re- ordered to safety.

A home is where a family lives in peace and safety and the people in your home should be the ones you can count on no matter what. Even verbal fighters are a threat. Most verbal insulters are instigators. They say things like... you're so ugly, you're fat, they laugh with derision, they're usually lacking in IQ so their fighting style reminds you of a playground of bullies instead of intellectual grown- ups. 

You should tell your friend that taking out restraining or protection orders against people who are the safe ones and when these people are trying to help them, this is going to backfire on her when she really needs help. If she teaches her son to lie, like she is lying, her son is going to be in that terrible situation 'like the boy who cried wolf.' If she is trying to ruin the reputation of decent people she may be taken to court for her slanderous suggestive accusations.

Why doesn't she fight the people who are actually bad in her life? Ask her directly if she took out a restraining order or a protection order? Is it possible someone else did this? Is it possible there are people trying to lock them away and keep their abuse private? Is someone taking out restraining orders and protection orders and putting their names on them to make sure nobody goes to their homes to rescue them? Do ask these questions immediately so this can be resolved.

                                                            Think clearly, ask directly, and act wisely

Phone Problems

 Neil, (he's the oldest male in the Guenter family so he is most responsible for any and all injurious issues) is my son Scott's arm broken? Can you find out if anyone has been abusive in his life? You should be able to find out. You like being the oldest responsible person, don't you?

Thank you. 

Little sister Elfrieda

They say my phone just doesn't work way out here.