My Handmade Inventory

 

This cushion, my handmade pillow cover, is in the gazebo.

This handmade pseudo flag blanket is made of my old jeans and it is upstairs, at 225.

These are my journals... the 'tree journal' has 'The Orchard Walk' in my pen printing on it... the other journals are in a heavy vintage case... I have about 38 life journals of my church sermon notes and prayer concerns, in them. I really need those back.

Here are a few pictures of my inventory in my wicker trunk with the wooden slats lid, in the living room, at 225 and in my solid wood sideboard, in the front bedroom...

along with souvenirs of my London trip...

I have two of these glasses... 

crystal... Boston pattern...

My guitar, my weights, my journals...

Please pack this plate carefully. I purchased it at Pineridge Hollow, 25 years ago.

There's my site map, in the back bedroom, at 225. My middle cushion is in the gazebo... my right and left cushions are... in wicker trunk...

That's some of my inventory in my armoire... that armoire is in the back bedroom, currently, at 225, with my clothes and my birth certificate and personal life documents and external hard drive, etc., of photos.

My six- hook rack is in the hallway with my 15 coats and jackets on it (from 25 years of living), at 225.

... to be continued...

My Books

Here's a little help if you need to know where my books are, at 225.

My self- published novels, in boxes, (14-15 boxes) from the printer, are in the basement bedroom along with one of my antique bed frames, double size.

I have them stacked on one of my 'Costco' bakers' racks so they don't get damaged. On the other Costco bakers' rack, in that room, I have a few of my clothes, Christmas wreaths, my wicker basket with my extra Mikasa plates as well as my 'Elizabethan' square plates that I mentioned in a previous blog, that I used for a church fundraiser.

I stacked my Fraiche Christmas ornaments next to that shelf. On the antique bedframe, I have a, somewhat inflated, grey double air mattress, that I purchased at Almost New for $65. On top of that bed frame I also have my 'Sealy' posture bed, brand new, that I purchased at Mega Deals for approximately, $170.00. On top of that is my box of Christmas ornaments, in a square red and white striped box. Inside is my 40 year ornament collection.

In that same room is my paperwork suitcase. They can't miss finding that. It has my income taxes from, approximately, 2008, or so. I need all my paperwork so, please leave everything intact, in that suitcase. In the other suitcase, that is also a brown vintage case, are some of my shoes, etcetera. I have some inventory items in that room. Please just pack them or call me to pack my things.

There are, also, a few books on the shelf, in that room. The rest of my books, in the basement, are in the white bookcase, in the 'rec room' area. My school workbooks are in a clear container, on the righthand side, top shelf. Pictures of my three sons, in picture frames that my Dad made, and were displayed at Cornelius' funeral, are on the left hand side of my bookcase. These are heritage treasures, and I consider them all priceless.

In a list I forwarded to a lawyer, I said that my current husband could keep one of my white pine bookcases, that I and my deceased husband, made, together. That bookcase, in the basement, is next to his rowing machine and a metal locked cabinet that holds our wedding certificate.

My vintage and research books, upstairs, in two dark brown Ikea bookcases, are very needful for me to continue doing work that I chronicle for future possibilities. My old book on 'Kings' is on the right of the righthand bookshelf. Everything on those bookcases is necessary for my research. The only funeral pamphlets, of my Dad Cornelius, are in a clear container in the bottom shelf of the left bookcase. 

I can be contacted, directly, if my husband has trouble packing my things.  

Extremely important, to me, are all my photographs. My photographs, of my life, are upstairs. I also have 1,000 developed photos, from Walmart, which I have in a brown paper bag.

All of my husbands' previous life photos are in the basement, safely in his containers. I made sure of that.

Restorative Justice

What is restorative justice?

Most assuredly, when my husband, who attacked me, admits his wrongdoing, and apologizes and...

when I have all my possessions in my safe vault of storage...

I will have experienced restorative justice.

Isn't it strange that ordinary people don't seem to know what it means to restore something or how to go about it?

When he holds my belongings hostage, he must pay the price for this... and restore my goods and services to me, in perfect condition.  

I had my finished quilts in plastic bags, awaiting my next move. All my fabrics are in very good clear plastic containers. Most of my winter boots are in the grey cabinet I purchased at Canadian Tire last year. I have all my mitts and scarves in there as well.

I have one bottle of L'Air du Temps perfume, one BCBG Sirop de Fleurs, three grey boxes of white diamonds perfume, a Lily perfume, a Paris Hilton perfume, a lily of the valley perfume. Most of them are stored in a basket, bottom shelf, in the bathroom... the Scott McGillivray vanity that I chose for that renovation. The reason it was the most ideal vanity is because the depth really needed to be very slim- fit for a narrow passage bathroom. The chosen vanity is white... the Lakeshore bathroom vanity in this link, has the same toilet that is featured in the photo in the bathroom in my four year home, in the renovation I organized. My Winnipeg workman purchased the toilet, in Winnipeg, and drove it all the way to where I lived to give me extraordinary service. 

We all have to admit that I made things very restorative with two very nice renovations. Now, he should be restorative, to me, and my future living quarters. Don't you think?

Living Expenses

 Let's talk about what happens in marriage regarding living expenses.

Before marriage or after divorce, causing singleness...

A single person has a 'rent' cost, driving expenses, if they can afford a vehicle, utilities, clothing for working, clothing for everything else, laundry expenses, groceries... incidentals. When her husband dies, not leaving her taken care of. His evil family takes everything they can and she eats soup.

So, let's say a woman, who is renting, is asked to marry a man who owns a house. His house doesn't have any debt. She used to own a house but that was lost in a terrible tragedy. Since then she has scraped by, and has lived on a shoe- string. Her life should get better if she marries a man who says, "I have enough for both of us."

The next thing that happens is 'how they eat' after marriage.

Doesn't that almost sound like a fairytale?

The woman says 'yes' and suddenly her life is all about growing a garden, so she can have food for winter. She grows enough tomatoes to make the most delicious soups and stews and lasagna, and so many delicious dinners. If any apples come her way, she makes apple pie filling for the winter.

At the beginning of the marriage, the man does the honourable thing and buys groceries so the wife can cook food for the two of them.

But two years into the marriage, he starts a strange diet and things get a little weird, in the kitchen.

He starts buying meat, meat, and more meat... and cheese, and canned fish,... he loves to stockpile. 

The wife makes all the food which is often 30 pounds of meat, per week.

On one shopping trip, the wife sees that the two pound hamburger packages are a good price. The husband is at work so the wife buys 30 two pound packages of lean ground beef. If the wife had still been single, this amount of hamburger would have been enough, for her, for 150 meals... enough hamburger for a year, so to speak. Because the husband is sharing with her, as well, he eats 120 meals from that hamburger and the wife only gets 30 meals.

So, the wife wonders... does he think that a wife cook, earning $16.03 per hour, should get paid to cook for him? He doesn't offer.

This year, her tomato harvest is stolen. The husband doesn't take care of the wife. He steals her tomatoes and apple pie filling and frozen hamburger and a few frozen roasts and frozen bacon and Java Club coffee beans, her special buy from Costco.

This is very, very bad, indeed.

Due to... no fault of her own... she is pushed into paying a huge rent bill that no person would ever sign for because she has no income.

The harvest loaf, (right) is my special autumn baking treat that I have made for 40 years. Here it is, at 225... I put it on my 'medallion' square plates, 8 or more, I have. I used them for a special fundraiser at Cross Church many years ago when I produced an Elizabethan- style table. I purchased these plates specifically for that event.

That's my basil, from the garden, that you see in the 'Better Homes and Gardens' bowl I purchased at Walmart.

I also have Christmas ornaments that I used for a Cross Church fundraiser, a different year, stuck at 225, awaiting me to get them into a truck, so I can use all I own, where I, currently, live.

My garden box, in the back, must be missing my 'gardening touch.' My son made this for me after the death of my loved one. 

Now, it is back to soups, in Winnipeg... because the wife has been forced to live on 'next to nothing' as she was never offered a job or any means of support for the entire four years awey.

I am, anxiously, awaiting all my things, at my rented storage unit, in Winnipeg. I cannot bake and cook properly because my pots and bakeware are all at 225 as well as all my groceries.

I have was asked if I want a 'diversion' and I thought, well, isn't four years of hard labour, at 225, enough of a diversion compared with working a job I was getting paid for in Winnipeg?

I was asked to...

 I was asked to serve on a 'Youth Justice Committee' around 1997. 

This committee was made up of volunteer people who had skills that were deemed valuable for mediation between victim and perpetrator.

A police officer was on the committee. A school teacher; and I was really encouraged to take part in this program.

The goal was a type of reconciliation between parties through unbiased mediation. 

I was greatly honoured, at that time, to be asked to serve on this committee but I declined due to personal job responsibilities that curtailed my time. The volunteer hours that would have been required of me were, simply, not possible with my three growing sons... at that time.

Whose Responsibility?

Each day I apply for jobs, in Winnipeg and I write my blog and I plan my future. 

Every situation in life has a 'who's responsible for this' factor to it. 

'As a writer, sometimes, the only value in an experience is the scene possibility... to write an extreme situation into a novel so that we can all learn to be better people.' Quote from my blog entitled 'Is it a crime?'

Today, I will sketch a few situations and then give my opinion on who is responsible in each situation... according to facts given. There is a problem, in each situation, with knowing what the facts are; trusting what the facts are; believing what the people say; Reasonableness of communication; Integrity of character; Possible work produced to support the individuals' portfolio of experience.

Todays' situation will only have to do with husbands and wives. Marriage is one of my favourite topics to write about. Warren and Elfrieda used to do 'fireside chats' (In everything the prudent acts with knowledge, but a fool flaunts his folly.) and sit, facing one another, and discussing 'current issues,' at 225. 

Here's an example:

Warren felt he had a lot of experience from his first marriage. Elfrieda felt she had a lot of experience from her first marriage.

Husband and Wife live alone, together. This is a new marriage for both of them.

Current wife has no criminal record.

It is unsure if husband has a clean record.

To the best of their knowledge, in their marriage, neither has committed adultery against each other.

Husband has had escalating emotional episodes of spontaneous anger within the past two years. There is no particular, identifiable, reason because all of their respective children are 'out of the house' at last.

Wife has blogged about some of these incidents, instead of publishing in hard copy (almost all psychology self-help books are, about half, situational to individual cases in order for people to arrive at that ah hah moment of understanding; for the purpose of resolving personal relationship problems).

So, really simple example.

Wife is sleeping on a Saturday, late night... and awakens, before midnight, to take a senior citizens' pee. Groggily, she gets out of bed, goes to the bathroom, her elbow knocks a perfume bottle off her round, antique mirror on the left side of the vanity, next to the toilet. Wife has purchased three bottles of her favourite kind of perfume from local drug mart store and a few other bottles, in that month. 

The noise, of the perfume bottle hitting the floor evokes a challenge from the bedroom, as the husband says, "Did you close the windows?

"No, I didn't close the windows," wife says. 

Husband replies, "Because I just turned off your air conditioner and opened all the windows."

"I didn't close any windows," wife calmly responds to his agitative voice. She goes back into the bedroom. 

Husband jumps out of bed saying, "I am so tired of this," and leaps to confront his wife and with a unreal fierceness, says, "I'm going to punch you in the face."

Wife jumps back.

Husbands' fist glances off her chest and she starts screaming that he has hit her.

Husband smirks, tries to shush her and wife says he needs to get out of their bedroom.

He doesn't immediately leave the room. 

She gets a frying pan, to defend herself.

When his arm is raised again, the frying pan is used as a shield and husbands' fingernails cut his forehead.

Husband has the audacity to get a court order to lock up all of his wifes' belongings, her personal business inventory, her entire lifes' possessions, including clothing, her published novels, her 18 finished, hand- made, quilts, hand- made pillow cases, an entire house contents from her 48 years of collecting before she ever met this husband. 

Wife is forced to live in hotel and then try to find income to live in costly rental while this debacle is on the warming rack.

So, simple enough situation.

Question: Is this legal? 

I don't think so.

Question: Does the husband have dementia? Does he have OCD? Is he being dishonest about anything that he has been unwilling to divulge to the wife?

Question: Is their relationship able to salvaged?

Question: What is the best path forward for the working careers of each individual?

Wife has been bonded. Husband hasn't.

Can this be resolved in a 'fireside chat?'

Kiss of Promise

 I have all my personal information at 225 5th Avenue, N.E., in Dauphin. It is being guarded by my husband who has assured me that... should even one item of my personal belongings be missing when I can pick up all I own... he, himself will personally pay for anything that is missing or damaged.

That is what a husband should do.

This is my guitar... It's in a black cardboard case with denim- style stitching on it. Warren will guard that with his whole heart. He knows how much music means to me.

So, on the night table... some people say 'coffee table' (both of mine are still at 225)... so, on the bare floor (I am also waiting for that lovely blue rug I purchased at the furniture store in Dauphin) of the apartment I am renting; I am reading 'Why Marriages Succeed or Fail... by John Gottmann, PH.D.

This kiss of promise encapsulates...  I have all my personal information at 225 5th Avenue, N.E., in Dauphin. It is being guarded by my husband who has assured me that... should even one item of my personal belongings be missing when I can pick up all I own... he, himself will personally pay for anything that is missing or damaged.

This photo was taken in the back yard of 225... this is our wedding day... so, I wanted everything to be very legal when it came to 'where I moved my belongings'. That's why we got married right on the property where all of my life possessions were. I only feel comfortable with my investments around me.

I was told that if you get married on a property... your legal rights to it are very firm and should there be any renovations or upgrades done by the couple in the photo, the owners, that is a absolute sign of foundational principles of marriage being displayed in the 'bettering' of the house they have lived in together. 

McMunn's, in Dauphin, was in ecstasy every time I picked up building materials in a year when one employee said... 'I would never pay these prices for lumber.'

I can't even count how many trips to the lumber stores I made to buy all the materials for the upgrades. This was my work.

Warren was at Norwex... getting paid by that company.

I should mention that I, Elfrieda, have three sons. Warren has four sons. 

We kept our lives, very separate, in this respect... for respect, of course.